The Missing Years

Over my career during this period I made little art outside of keeping a sketchbook. However, it proved to be an immensely important time personally and reinforced my commitment to the arts.

Initially my break was mostly practical, I had two children and shared parental responsibilities to help raise two toddlers Paul 2000 and Paloma 2003. I was working in interior renovation and kitchen remodeling and eventually started my own small business out of Jersey city New jersey. I wouldn't say it was smooth sailing, in fact I found it more and more difficult to prosper. During 2007 to 2008 some of you may have experienced the IMF and ultimate crash of the markets in 2008. This had been brewing for a while and business and jobs became impossible to find. In short I ended up losing almost everything and ended up losing stable housing as well as a divorce. While I enjoyed being a parent I ended up in a homeless shelter for almost 4 months. I really felt hopeless and not very optimistic about the future let alone my art. 

 

When I entered the scary world of the NYC shelter system I was disillusioned with both my personal life  and art. I was more concerned with my children and keeping my family close ( my kids were with their mom). I don't bring this up to garner pity, but to share some valuable insights. I was putting effort into being optimistic, visiting my kids, picking them up from school, going to the library together, returning everyday to the shelters which often could be  an intimidating environment. First off I met some amazing people in the shelter and wish today that we didn't have a bias often put on the homeless that they are lazy or not campable. Secondly, I was able to start doing small studies and little paintings in my notebooks (some which I will share that were made during 2007 and 2009) I even found a job through one of the Job fairs that NYC required every able bodied person to attend. Finally a job. Right? I was hired at a nonprofit working ironically with the homeless in a mobile unit because I had previous experience only to learn I couldn't keep the job because I didn't have a car. Feeling demoralized and back at the shelter I continued working in my sketchbook. I woke up one day and brought many of my drawings and little paintings down in  Soho at the  corner of Broadway and Houston. I set up a spot to sell my art. No, I didn't make a lot of money but I started to slowly make some money to get back on my feet but more importantly it strengthened my commitment to my art all of a sudden I was motivated and inspired. I met lovely people and people who enjoyed my art. It was affordable art right on the corner. I soon got a few chances to exhibit my art in galleries and had many repeat customers and since Soho was still an international area of NYC I had people from many different counties buying my work. Finally in 2009 I was given affordable housing and was able to have my kids part of each week and I was determined to build up my art. 

 

I bring this up for those of you who may question your goals, your passions and what to do. I had to balance  making a living and still doing something you feel connected with. During the rather dark days of homelessness missing my family and a sense of purpose I found it right where it always was,in me, and this journey continues today. While I am lucky to paint and have a studio, one never knows what's around the corner. However if you remain truthful to your work your work will be truthful and then you have a great path forward.